Deshaun Watson, Cleveland Browns Quarterback and Sex Addict?

The Recovering CEO  0:01  
Hello, and welcome to the recovering CEO podcast. My name is Derrick, I'm the recovering CEO, and this podcast is to help anyone struggling with addiction. And, you know, help them get help. And today's topic is something that I've been watching a little bit and finally looked into a more and it's very disturbing. And that is Deshaun Watson, who is former Houston quarterback who was traded to the Cleveland Browns recently, very talented young quarterback. He's young, I don't know how old he is 26, 24 I should know that but I don't know. But he just got a $230 million guaranteed contract to go play for Cleveland, which in many ways is great because I think Cleveland deserves a good quarterback. The trouble with Deshaun Watson is he is I think refusing to accept responsibility for his behavior. So, as I'm sure you're familiar with 22, massage therapists, all women have claimed that during massage he exposed himself and acted inappropriately made them feel uncomfortable, etcetera, etcetera. You know, basically, you know, I read about it, and it's actually very disturbing. You know, he would say he only wants to cover up with a little towel. And then once they started massaging him, you know, and he would claim that he needs a massage around his groin area and his stomach area. And then he would take off the towel and proceed to, you know, get a hard-on in front of these women and act like it was normal. You know, and then they'd be like, Excuse me, and he'd be like, Oh, what's wrong? You know, what's wrong? This is normal, you know, and, you know, so 22 of them. So he was the grand jury. And this is serious, you know, there was a grand jury convened, he didn't play for Houston last year, the Texans, he did not play for Houston. Last year, he sat out. So the grand jury said that we're not going to try him in a criminal trial. And that's okay, I guess. So now, there's civil lawsuits, right. And the trouble is, you know, in the NFL, I think lacks a lot of credibility, you know, the NFL NFL players get away with a lot. You know, they get away with a lot, they get away with a lot of assault abuse, you know, there's been multiple cases of inappropriate things that athletes do. And sometimes they get in trouble, but often they don't, you know, and here Deshaun Watson with full knowledge of what he is accused of doing, which I mean, it's, I don't think there's really any question about that. But you know, and he's still got paid a tour and $230 million, guaranteed contract. So, you know, and the NFL is watching this closely, and the NFL is going to take action, you know, but really, it's clear that I think, you know, Deshaun Watson has enough money to first of all, admit responsibility. You know, you can do it in a way where you don't incriminate yourself, you know, admit responsibility, which is, you know, hey, you know, what, I may have done some things that were inappropriate during these massages. Apologize, right. Deshaun Watson needs to apologize to all these women. Very sorry, if I offended people, I'm very sorry, if I made anyone feel uncomfortable and very sorry, if my actions hurt you, and then he needs to pay them off. Pay them off, he just got a $230 million guaranteed contract, give them each, I don't know, a million dollars. That would still be a small percentage of his contract, you know, pay the lawyer, give them a million dollars and be done with it. You know, it's also an opportunity to realize that, you know, Deshaun Watson is not necessarily a bad person. You know, I mean, this is the recovering CEO, we are talking to addicts here. And addicts aren't bad people. They're sick people. You know, they're sick people trying to get well. The trouble is when somebody is so successful, right? It's such a talented athlete. Such a promising young man, as the son Deshaun. Watson, he has incredible skills, you know, he's not necessarily a bad person. He's just a very sick person. Does he have sex addiction? I don't know. You tell me. You know, if 22 women all agree that you took your towel off and you know, got a hard-on in front of them and then kind of like thrusted towards them while they were massaging your groin? I don't know. What do you think?

The Recovering CEO  4:49  
Do you think that maybe Deshaun Watson has a problem with sex addiction. You know, why did he have so many different massage therapists because each time he was Trying something new, you know, he wanted to try this behavior on different massage therapist because it's very exciting. You know, some, he ended up having consensual sex with right, as they've said and admitted, I think three of them, they did have consensual sex with them. And that's great, you know, good for him. The trouble is, there was many, many women 22, who said it was completely inappropriate. They cried, they felt assaulted, they felt abused. He was a very powerful person. He's like a famous person. And they were trying to provide a professional service. And he acted in a very unprofessional way, allegedly. You know, and there's repercussions, you know, do you really think 22 women just came up with the same story, the same description, exact same description that they told the cops? I mean, you know, this is very, this reminds me. I don't know, if I, you know, some of the Catholic Church scandals, you know, abusing young boys, it reminds me of the Baptist churches just coming out with a report on how many women were abused in the, you know, Christian Right Baptist Church. And it's all it's always swept under the rug. You know, the Catholic Church swept it under the rug, how many priests abused young boys, and here's a quarterback, very powerful person, very successful, very rich, can pretty much buy whatever he wants. I mean, he could he could buy women, right. But as a sex addict, and as someone struggling with sex addiction, it's not that exciting to just buy women, what's exciting, is to go into quote, unquote, professional massage. With a beautiful woman, or with a woman, it seems like, you know, any woman who's a massage therapist, and then to, you know, expose himself and to try his luck, you know, oh, what are they going to? Do? You know, am I going to get a happy ending? Are they going to cross the boundary? You know, are they going to love me? Are they going to be so attracted to me that can't handle it? Are they going to demand to have sex with me? Or they're going to, you know, whatever. I mean, whatever his fantasy is, but it's the fantasy. And it's, it's the lust and it's the buildup, you know, so it's very exciting for someone who deals with sex addiction. You know, I mean, me personally, I, you know, I've told you, I have all types of addictions. You know, I'm 25 years sober from drugs and alcohol. I do struggle with some boundaries around sex addiction, you know, I've learned that. And I know that it's not the best idea for me to go to get a massage. It's just not, you know, it's too intimate. It's too close. And it's, it's triggering, you know, it's, it's just not something I do. You know, I have trouble with boundaries. And I think Deshaun Watson has troubled boundaries, too. You know, so this isn't necessarily him just being a criminal or a sexual predator. You know, it's him making really bad choices, like an addict would, you know, it's choosing the heroin. It's like a heroin addict needs to keep getting high, even though it's causing problems for him. You know, this was causing problems for Deshaun Watson, and he kept doing it. The question is, is he still doing it? I mean, that's one of the reasons why I think he should admit to it, and get help. You know, there are programs for this, like, in my last episode, I just interviewed Dr. Rob, who is a prominent sex addiction therapist, I mean, there are places he can go and get help. But the thing is, is you know, everybody wants to sweep it under the rug, everyone wants to deny it. Oh, I didn't do anything inappropriate. I didn't do anything wrong. This was consensual. I didn't hurt these women. I'm innocent. I didn't do anything. And the lawyers get paid a lot of money to say that. And the NFL is incentivized to get him back on the field because that's where they make a lot of money. Cleveland, the browns, you know, and I liked the browns. I watched Draft Day and in Cleveland as a team, kind of like the Detroit Lions who have suffered for a long time they have loyal fans. You know, the dog pound I respect the Cleveland Browns. Why did they pick up Deshaun? Watson? Why did they pay him $230 million guaranteed? Knowing that he has all this on his record? Well, because they know it'll be swept under the rug and blown and kind of blow away you know, it'll die down, the negative bus will die down, you know, and if he wins them a Super Bowl, it'll all be forgotten.

The Recovering CEO  9:28  
Thing is I really, I'd rather this doesn't get swept under the rug. I think it's better for Deshaun Watson for one, you know, if he wants to be able to live with integrity for the rest of his life, he needs to admit what he did beg responsibility, beg forgiveness from these women, pay them off, you know, make it worth their while to have to deal with what they dealt with, which is awful. I mean, this is sexual assault. This is years of therapy, and some of these women may never get over the trauma. Right? And the rich and powerful in the NFL Well, they say, oh, it's no big deal. You know, it's no big deal. It's just normal massage. They chose to be a massage therapist, you know, you see body parts all the time. It's normal. It's not normal. It's not normal. It is sexual assault. You know, and if the grand jury is not going to indict him, the least he could do it have the common decency to admit that what he did was wrong. And to get help, and to pay a large fee to these women to help with their pain, and then to never do it again. You know, I think that's maybe the one of the reasons he won't admit that he's wrong. And he may, you know, the addict never wants to admit it. Because then you can't do it again. Right. So once I admit that I have a problem. Once I admit that I struggle with sexual addiction or lust, addiction, and boundaries around sex addiction, then I can't keep doing it. Because that's when it really starts to go into territory that is wrong, you know. And, you know, I always say the addict, the gift of awareness is one of the first things you get, right, the gift of awareness. You know, I remember when I realized I was an alcoholic. And I finally realized that I didn't even know what the word alcoholic, it wasn't part of my vocabulary, you know, but after going to therapy and learning about it, and watching my behavior and trial and error, and trying to drink and trying to control drugs and trying to, like, manage my drug use, you know, and I was the kind of person that you know, I'm only gonna smoke marijuana on the weekends. And next thing, you know, is smoking it every day. And it was spending all my money, and I was failing. And I just couldn't manage my life, you know, so I finally realized, oh, my gosh, I'm an addict. I'm an addict. I'm an alcoholic, you got me. You got me, I'm an alcoholic. These days. As I peel off layers of the onion, you know, I learned more about myself, I realized, you know what, I'm a food addict to very much addicted to sugar. And I try not to do that. You know, I try and live a healthy life. I'm not really addicted to work. I'm addicted to networking. sloth is a good one. For me, I'm good at good at binge watching Netflix, I'm really good at that. You could say that's an addiction. And then I also learned that sex addiction is a problem. You know, so I can't look at porn. I can't masturbate you know, you could say masturbation is normal, but not, not if you struggle with boundaries around sex addiction. You know, because from a young age, I have well worn pathways to addict as well worn pathways of way that ways that I have medicated myself. You know, there's things I've done since I was very young, to make myself feel better and safe to make myself feel like I'm going to be okay, that I'm going to survive, and to deal with the shit of life, like life is shitty. I mean, it's also wonderful and beautiful and all that, but it's also extremely difficult. You know? So whether I, you know, like, I mean, like someone like Deshaun Watson shoot, he can go buy a new Lamborghini. Right, that's gonna get him some endorphin rush. But I bet you know, I don't know, dollars for donuts. I don't know what that phrase is. But I bet dollars for donuts that he gets a much more higher endorphin rush from, you know, just go into your general massage appointment and seeing what happens. You know, I mean, I understand that, you know, I, when I read would happen, I've never done anything like that. But I understand that. And, you know, but for the grace of God go I hear stories about people who do things, you know, they do things and they get caught, and then I read it. I'm like, Oh, my God, I would never want to do that. I would never want to get caught for that. That's embarrassing. You know, it's embarrassing and they talk about an addiction. They talk about the incomprehensible, demoralisation. You know, when I lose everything, when an addict loses everything, they call it, incomprehensible demoralisation.

The Recovering CEO  14:02  
hitting bottom, you know, hitting bottom, realizing that this is the end, I've done some really bad things. And I'm publicly embarrassed and shamed. You know, most people when they come into any type of recovery, they don't just come in on their own. You know, as Dr. Rob said, in my last podcast, everybody comes with an invitation. You know, whether it's their wife, husband, significant other partner saying, you know, what, if you don't change your behavior, I'm going to leave you, right? That's a big one. It's oftentimes the police or a judge that says, Okay, your behavior is illegal, it's against the law. I think you have a problem. You need to get help. And if you don't, you're gonna go to prison, right? So it's often a judge. So people choose recovery. They say, You know what, I'd rather not go to prison. I'd rather go to therapy. You know, I'd rather go to 12 step meetings, you know, and the other one is usually your doctor. All right, so, specifically for alcoholics, you know, after a while, you know, if you notice a lot of the famous rock stars and stuff, they all overdose around age 28, I believe as the magic number where they overdose or commit suicide, Jimi Hendrix Janis Joplin Kurt Cobain. Oh God, who's that really one famous blues singer from? From England. I always forget her name. It's not a lot of smart step. But that amazing woman overdosed. And they all fuckin overdose, right? So drugs will take you out early. But if you're a drinker, you can drink for a long time. Sometimes without serious consequences. They call that functional alcoholism. Some people just grow up with alcohol. It's just a serious part of their life. They drink all the time. You know, I see people that drink all the fucking time. They always have alcohol, always. And then they don't think it's a problem. Until at age 45, right? So I'm like, 49. So around this age, mid 40s, maybe 50s. Your doctor is going to tell you, you know what, Derek? I noticed that your livers enlarged. If you don't stop drinking, you're gonna die. Your liver is gonna fail, your kidneys are failing. And you need to stop drinking. That's when it's tough to stop. That's when an addict or an alcoholic says Oh, shit, really? I need to stop. And then good luck. Good luck. Good luck trying to change 40 years 30 years of behavior of hard drinking. You know, so someone who deals with sex addiction, you know, sex. Sex is a normal thing, right? It's part of procreation. It's part of what humans do. You know, we procreate we have sex, whether it's for fun, whether it's to have a baby, whatever, you know, it's a way to connect. It's a way to, I don't know, for two people that enjoy themselves, you know. But when sex addiction, you know, they talk about in Alcoholics Anonymous, which is the foundation of all 12 Step programs, they're talking about instincts, going astray, you know, instincts and access, right. So, sex, having sex is a natural instinct, right? If you see animals in the springtime, they have sex, they have babies, you know, we just had some baby birds at our house that are Robins, right? It's instinctual, that is how life goes on. But when our instincts go overboard, you know, when it goes beyond normal, and when it goes beyond healthy and unhealthy behavior, and the addict will start doing things that they never thought they would do, you know, having an affair,

The Recovering CEO  17:38  
taking off the towel at the massage place and hinting that they should, you know, give you a happy ending, like the Deshaun Watson story, or, I mean, there's lots of things, you know, there's, you know, losing jobs, over watching pornography at work. There is, you know, acting inappropriately with women, there is online chats, you know, people get in trouble. I mean, people get in trouble, you know, and it's only when they start crossing boundaries, and they lose their money, and they lose their family. And they lose the respect to the community that they stop. You know, it's only after they lose everything that they stop. If they stopped earlier, they could get help. Right. So I mean, how old is Deshaun? Watson? Let me just see here. Let me see how old he is. Because he's young. You know, and I hate to talk about a person. Okay, so he's 26 years old. You know, and I'm talking about him here, but I'm talking about him because I think someone needs to point this out. And Deshaun Watson needs to get the help. He's 26 years old. He has 60 more years to live, maybe 70. I mean, he's very healthy individual. Now granted, football will take a few years off your life, because of all their concussions and whatnot, you know, but that's a price to pay. That's a price to pay to get $230 million guaranteed, which is money I'll never see. You know, but I'll tell you if he doesn't deal with this. These accusations, you know, if he doesn't make this right, and if he doesn't get help, it's a progressive addiction, you know, which means it gets worse. Okay. So, you know, 22 massage therapists have come forward right now there's a class action civil lawsuit against him. Alright, so that's bad. It could get much worse. Is Deshaun Watson married? I don't really I don't even know. You know, I don't. I don't think he is. I don't think he is but but he has a bright future ahead of him. If he gets his shit together. You know my opinion. Deshaun Watson, like I said, admit that what you did was wrong. Beg forgiveness. Let the world know that that behavior that is described in this lawsuit is wrong, that it's wrong, help out all the other massage therapists out there who have to deal with guys that try and cross boundaries and commit sexual assault all the time you think this doesn't happen all the time. Now granted Deshaun Watson, like I said, is a very famous, rich, rich person, right? Just like Harvey Weinstein, you know, Harvey Weinstein got away with years and years of sexual assault because he had so much money. And he just paid people off. And he threatened, you know, ruining their career. And I don't think the Shawn Watson did that. But this was, he's only 26 years old. Right? When you give someone aged 22 out of college, you get a huge contract and millions of dollars. Maybe you didn't have good upbringing, but the thing is, he had an addictive personality, you know. And this is an example of trying to sweep mental illness under the rug. Okay, so today is I'm recording this on May 25 2022. All right. Yesterday was that shooting in Texas, where 19 school children and two teachers were gunned down. They were gunned down by an 18 year old with an AR-15. Who I guarantee is suffering from mental illness, right? mental illness and addiction go together. Right? There was that shooter in Buffalo recently, who killed 10 African Americans at the buffalo supermarket. That was a racist hate crime. Okay. He was mentally ill. He was mentally ill. He bought into all the stuff that he watches on Fox News and on these different, you know, 4chan and these different conservative networks to try and brainwash people. You know, he bought into all that. Did he have addiction? Maybe he might have a gun fetish, you know. But all this mental illness goes hand in hand. And we can't sweep it under the rug Deshaun Watson has an opportunity to make a difference in the world. He has an opportunity to be a role model for young men that are coming up. You know, a lot of these young athletes, you know, I'm a big college football fan, right? I watch college football. As most you know, I'm a Michigan State Spartan. I'm a big fan of Michigan State Spartans.

The Recovering CEO  22:18  
There's lots of top recruits coming to Michigan State University, top recruits in the country, four star five stars, kind of like Deshaun Watson, and they're watching him get away with this bullshit. And pay people off and just never admit that what he did was wrong. That's a pretty bad example. You know, the NFL can find people they can like, they can try and make it better. You know, like, when Ben Roethlisberger did something, you know, Antonio Brown, I mean, all these people do stuff. And we had the suppose that role models in the NFL, you know, Tom Brady as a role model, everyone loves Tom Brady. And sure, Tom Brady is great. Why isn't Tom Brady speaking up? Nobody fucking speaks up. You know, everyone's watching Deshaun Watson closely, we are watching the Deshaun Watson situation closely. The fuck is that? They're just waiting till he gets off without admitting responsibility, he probably will pay off these women. But he's not gonna admit responsibility, which means there's not a growth opportunity. There's not an opportunity to raise awareness about addiction. And to help these young men that are going into college, you know, a few years ago, Michigan State had a very highly touted recruiting class, you know, and these young men, I'm not sure if they were ever prosecuted, but they basically got in trouble for their actions with women on campus. They were kicked out of school. It had horrendous repercussions. I mean, they were blackballed. I think some of them may have gone to jail. They lost everything. You know, they had the potential to be very successful to make lots of money to, to do great things, and they lost everything. It was taken away from them at age 19, age 18. Because nobody talked about it, because nobody talked about, you better be careful with your sexual behavior. Right. So Michigan State actually runs programs, they have a survival of rape, and sexual assault, who runs programs, I'll actually put the link in this podcast, she runs programs where she teaches the athletes at Michigan State, you know, the football team, especially what not to do, what is appropriate, what is inappropriate, you know, when they're teaching these young athletes now, and that is so important, but what better teacher than one of the most visible, successful talented quarterbacks in the NFL, admitting that what they did was wrong, that they shouldn't have done it. And that they're very sorry, and that they're going to take steps to get help. You know, that's how you make an impact. Deshaun Watson, you want to be someone's hero. You want to be every kid's hero in Cleveland. admit to what you did. Apologize. Beg forgiveness. Give these women money to make up for all the trauma you caused, donates his foundations, make some fucking amends for your bad behavior, and then get help. It's impossible to live a life as a practicing sex addict. I don't care how much money you have, eventually, the law, your job, your wife, your significant other. It's all going to come crashing down. You will lose everything. I know. I've seen it. People lose everything. This disease will kill you. It's a killer. Right? You think drugs and alcohol are killers? Sure, right? Everyone's overdosing on like fentanyl, right? food addictions a killer. You see how many people have heart attacks, how many people have diabetes, right? Sex addiction is a killer, it will kill you. Don't do it. Get sober, you're 26 years old, you have 60 to 70 years left to live. Set an example for the young men coming up behind you set an example lead by example. I'm okay with you protecting yourself and still having a career. But get some help man, get some help. It's pretty obvious that you're a sick person, you're not a bad person, but you're unwell. And you can get help, and you can improve your life. And you can really make a difference. So I hope this raises awareness. You know, I don't have anything against the Shawn Watson. Like I said, I've always liked him as a player. I think he's extremely talented. I want the Browns to do well. But quit dancing around this issue. Quit denying it. You know, if you don't admit this, this will haunt you for the rest of your life. If you don't deal with this, you will never be able to shake it. It will stay with you forever. And I think you want to have a clear conscience maybe, you know, you want to be clear conscience you want to be able to get healthy and live live the life you want. Right? To be a role model. To be a franchise leading quarterback, maybe to win a Super Bowl. Can you imagine bringing a Super Bowl to Cleveland? Can you imagine someday marrying someone having kids and being able to know that

The Recovering CEO  27:18  
everything in your past is not going to haunt you that there's nothing to hide? Don't hide, man, don't run from your past, deal with it. Deal with it appropriately. If you want to talk to me, you can talk to me, but there's other professionals. I'm not a professional. I'm just I'm just the recovering CEO, right. I'm just a dude. That is trying to help people with addiction to raise awareness. I don't know if anyone's gonna see this. Nobody frickin listens to my podcast. But maybe. Maybe this one they will. And maybe Deshaun Watson if you hear me. I love you, man. I'm sorry, you're going through this. But I'll tell you honestly, deal with it. Deal with it. Don't run from it. Give me a call. Give me a call. You can find me. Give me a call Cleveland fans don't hate on me. If there's any of the Shawn Watson squad don't hate on me. I'm speaking the truth. I'm not trying to hurt anybody. I'm trying to create some healing around this situation, which is a shit situation for everyone. And the sooner gets dealt with and the sooner it wraps up, the better for everyone. But let's not run from it. Let's turn this into a positive let's turn this negative into a positive. And let's make an impact so we can avoid you know, the next school shooting or the next. You know Harvey Weinstein, the next Catholic abuse scandal. Let's avoid that. Let's avoid the bad stuff. Let's help people with mental awareness. And we need people that are rich and powerful like Deshaun Watson to help people who are struggling with addiction. It's not just human. It's millions of people. You think you're the only one? You're just one of the most public ones. Alright, let me just say one more thing. Think about Robert Kraft. Do you remember when he got busted in a sting operation? Right. He's rich. He's rich as hell. I don't know if he owns Kraft Foods, but he owns the frickin New England Patriots. Right Robert Kraft owner of an NFL team. You know how hard it is to become an owner of an NFL team. And he gets caught at a massage parlor. Not a legitimate massage place like Deshaun Watson or Deshaun Watson like to work with legitimate massage places and then try and cross boundaries with them. But Robert Kraft went to massage places where it's well known that you can get sex, happy endings, whatever you want. There's a full menu at the place Robert Kraft went to and he got busted. That got swept under the rug. Nobody fucking talked about it. Did Robert Kraft get help? Who knows right? People were paid off. And it just went away. You know rich people make stuff go away. Robert Kraft could probably use help Robert Kraft Why don't you help addicts out addicts out there. You're rich. Why don't you put your money where your mouth is and help addicts out there? Right? Don't run from it. Don't live the rest of your life and addiction live in the light. Live in the light. Alright, peace and love. Thanks for listening to this podcast. If you enjoyed it, please rate rate and review the recovering CEO podcast and we will see you next time. Have a good day.